… and was content to be so.
My friend had a hell of a good photos exhibition, and a group of magic friends had a good dinner.
But I hurt, and am so very tired, just sitting in a corner, wanting to go home. They are still enjoying. I am driving some home. So I wait.
Not much more, of course. The spark I can muster has diminished, and I need to hide in my den. Safe.
Run, roll away.
Know the feeling. Time to reassess your boundaries, and limits of physical endurance for such outings. Making commitments to drive others whilst it is great to be able to help people, sometimes you need to dictate your terms; i.e. make it plain at the start that you are happy to drive them as long as they are ready to leave at . This will be the time that you know you will run out of steam or turn into a pumpkin, or half an hour before that so that you can be safe at home when it happens. Then if they want to stay on at the event, they are aware that it will be up to them to arrange a different way home.
I know that in the morning, as soon as 11 am rolls around, ‘the curtain comes down’ . I also know that my energy window usually only lasts 2 hours so I cram all the important things into this time.
Sounds simple, but the only bugga is that my condition will vary and take me by surprise just when I thought I got the hang of it!
Anyway…you don’t have to stop helping people – it feels fantastic to be able to give a little something back – but perhaps refine the way you offer help.
I hope you feel a little more revived when you read this.
PS Pity that the friends for whom you were waiting didn’t notice your tiredness.
PPS Did you speak up at the time? If you are feeling wretched, you need to let people know. Real friends and those who care would be horrified to know you were sitting there suffering in silence. Unfortunately, we aren’t born with mindreading skills.
I can see you not wanting to spoil everyone’s fun though. We can be selfless and generous to a fault! Love Jodie
My friends were great, when i came back from balcony sitting on my own, they came over, and i said i need to go, and they grokked and were fine. It is about my reluctance to spoil things, and that is an ongoing battle. I am getting better, i even asked for nej to push my wheelchair – normally i hate that…
yesterday i ad two sides of the coin, a few friends who understood me needing a day to myself, and cancelling them (again, sigh), and a couple who muttered, one even getting rather snippy. So, friends or acquaintances, hmm…or just not understanding? Have to work THAT one out! In fairness, it is damn tough to get outside of it…
erm, forgive my ignorance…what does grok mean?
I used this for years before it became common geek parlance, due to being a huge Heinlein fangirl:)
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/grok?r=75&src=ref&ch=dic
Hth* explain it better than it cold:)
*you probably know, but ‘hope this helps’